My Birthday Prezzie

I don't usually get birthday presents, but this year got 2 presents!

My first Fred Perry from Morgan, thanks for giving something that i don't bear to buy. I know you do not have a lot of spare cash, so i really appreciate your gift :)

A 2011 diary from D&D (Dyon and Duncan). Really thank you both for the gift, wanted to get one diary for the new year but luckily i did not lol. Great knowing Duncan this year and thanks Dyon for introducing. Hope both of you have a great year ahead.

The last 10 years

Last night, while attending the Jubilee celebration of Jurong scouts, in the midst of walk through the gallery of memories, i was thinking to myself, what was i doing for the past 10 years since i have graduated from Jurong Sec.

Out of these 10 years, 2 years i spent in JJC, 2 years 2 months in army, 4 years in NUS and 1 year in NIE, rest of the time probably slacking or working while waiting for the next phase to happen. But outside of these commitments, i was wondering if i have wasted my 10 years on things that does not matter now. During the earlier years of this decade, i think that i was spending my time going back for scouts and playing dark age of camelot. While i do enjoyed the time spent going back to scout, i do not know if i have actually contribute anything to the troop, or merely made it worse. Thus, not really time well spent.

I kind of cut down my time spent on scouting after i entered army. Towards the end of my second years, a major world phenomenon happened; World of Warcraft was released. I spent a total of almost 5 years on the game, from really hardcore gamer to casual, and back to hardcore again. Started guild with fellow friends, watched it failed and disbanded, join another guild and slowly fade away. I only stopped playing the game probably early 2009, ironically when i was using WoW for my fyp. I still remembered when i finally cancelled my subscription and stop playing WoW, the first few days or weeks was quite scary. For the first time in my life, i finally realize the effects of over-gaming. I felt that i have wasted time playing something that basically yield nothing. While there are the social benefits in playing online game, after quitting the game, everything disappeared with the subscription. 5 years of time spent on earning something that is virtual and with no real skills gained.

Concluding the decade, somehow i actually wished that i have live a different life that seek to discover myself more rather than spending time on these less useful stuff. While i will not be who i am without all my experiences, perhaps i would not have felt that i have wasted my youth away. So i wondered, if i can really make good use of my time for the next 10 years? Only time will tell, when i think back a decade later.

Life, efforts and pains

Recently, a few things occur in my life that made me think that life requires a lot of efforts and full of pain. Firstly, passed my quarter of a century birthday, my metabolism rate finally caught up with me. I can no longer anyhow eat like in the past without gaining some weight. Worse, human has to be designed in a way that how you lose weight differs from how you gain weight, which made staying slim tedious.

Secondly, to stay healthy and keep fit through gym requires really a lot of effort and motivation. You need to be motivated to hit the gym whenever you can, not to mention that in the beginning it is painful for the muscle during conditioning. I am not really a sporty person, therefore motivation aside, i get really bored going to gym alone.

Thirdly, my wisdom tooth finally caught up with me this year. I extracted two wisdom teeth on one side earlier this month, and the after effect isn't too pleasant. Pain aside after the surgery, now there is a hole at the back which kind of accumulates a lot of food, therefore i need to be more thorough with my cleaning. This made me think how our mouth is one of the source of problem and pain. Apart from eating the wrong thing, i remembered that our teeth are quite burdensome, especially in primary school where the baby teeth are replaced with the stronger and more permanent teeth.

Lastly, life is a cruel world. There are lots of things that can hurt you, but the good thing is there are plenty of other things that make your world sweet. For those out there who are facing pains in their life, hopefully the new year will be a better one.

Wardrobe

While clearing my wardrobe, i came to realize that i actually have a lot of clothes that i no longer wear. Some of them are too big (not that i slim down but apparently i tend to buy baggy clothes back then) or just out of fashion. After clearing off those that i force myself to throw away, i realize that i still have quite a bit of clothes, but i remembered before i embarked on my shopping trip during the past week, i felt that i'm running out of clothes to wear, so why is it that my wardrobe is still so filled?

This led me to think of our excessive economy, where it is not enough to have enough. People need to have more and more, probably the best if one could just wear each item once. Maybe i should bear this in mind when i go shopping for clothes again next time, but i doubt i will shop any lesser lol.

Are you color blind?

An interesting notion that was use in Petronas advertisement which talks about different racial group.

I cannot help but notice that Singapore racial lines are getting blurred; Chinese now includes PRCs and Malaysian Chinese. Kind of made me think that Singapore is no longer just a multi-racial society, it just something more different and unique. Is it a good thing? I have no idea.

But i'm always curious how other countries with population like Singapore such as Finland and New Zealand managed to staff their economy with just locals, while some sectors like service and construction sectors have to rely on foreign workers. Someone once told me that it is because these countries have minimum wages, therefore people are willing to do these jobs. Maybe, but i'm not entirely convinced. Maybe it is just the stigma that we have created for ourselves over the years. Quite a heavy topic for an early morning eh....

My ringtone 1

My favourite song at the moment and also my ringtone :)

My Mood

It has been a period of ups and downs. My mood is almost like a bipolar person; swinging from euphoria to really just want to sleep to stop feeling this way. There is so much things that i want to say, but feel that no one is interested to listen. It is just a pity that i have to live life like that, but i guess do whatever to make you sleep at night.

Yesterday met Dyon in orchard and see him sell the Christmas hat for charity, seriously tough work. But congrats for hitting gold lol. And Alvin, you look damn nerdy in your executive wear and your black glasses.

My muscles are aching like hell from the two days of gyming and 1 day of swimming. I should keep up the pace and continue to swim tomorrow, as not to waste my money :p

Another rant for the day: Why the hell does Singapore sells winter wear when it is so freaking hot?! I can't even stop sweating by wearing little, confirm must get some emperor's new clothes material liao.

Goal for these few months

I have decided to start doing some routines just to make my life more structured and organized. Firstly, after my ippt i should starting doing a bit more gym and running to keep myself fit and healthy. Secondly, after finishing all my assignments in NIE, i should start preparing my resources before the school starts so as to have an easier time when i start teaching. Lastly, save more money to plan for vacation and buy new clothes.

Hmm.... seems like my goals have always been there, i just need to really start implementing them.

Moody on a slack Tuesday

I could almost believe that I might be too moody when I am free during a period of time when I have things to do. On moody days, I hate being asked to do things, just needed time to be on my own just to avoid negative feelings that could affect my emotions.

On a moody day, one could realize that the world works in mysterious ways, like how karma transferred from one event to another. So on this day, I experienced that empathy is not about thinking you know how the other person feel, but more like you experienced what the other person is feeling.

So today, I remembered that sometimes it's not about the daily performances that you put up, but it is always the extraordinary isolated performances that made people remember. I must bear that in mind, that being average is not good enough, one must shine once in a while.

Singapore Education System

A friend asked me to write something about Singapore Education System, so here I am after so long to blog about something. To me, education is not purely about the gaining of knowledge, but also on character development because the school environment plays an important role in the life of a student.

However, I find that there are many challenges facing the education system in providing a holistic education to students. Firstly, in the teaching of knowledge, the diversity of learners is a challenge in delivery of lessons as students have different needs and abilities to learn. Therefore, it is hard to have a lesson that caters to the needs of all students, which means that some students might be left out in class.

Secondly, in the character development of students, it is an uphill task for a teacher to be concerned with the many students that he/she has. It can be a mentally and physically challenging job if one remains totally committed to the character development of students. Furthermore, in order to help students, a rapport must be built between both parties in order for the child to be receptive, which requires time and effort.

Therefore, to hope that our education system will be able to achieve all the goals that we hope for is unrealistic, but yet the same time I believe that the system has produced a significant number of talented and civilized citizens of the new generation. While our education system is not perfect, it is not totally flawed. Most importantly is for us to reflect on the challenges and needs in order to improve our education system.

Almost the end of semester

In a 2.4km run, i would normally use up all my energy to try to pass my running during the last lap of the run. However, in my daily life apparently this is not the case. Towards the end of my semester, and i am feeling so lazy and tired to complete my very last assignment. Only 2 days left for me to finish my assignment, i'm sure i have to continue to do soon. But i'm already in holiday mood after completing both my micro-teachings, well it is really holiday soon, like in another 3 days.

The end of semester also spells the end of my GESL event, flea market at Simei Care Centre. Was a tiring but fun day :)

About you now

It's a weird feeling, feels like something gone but yet still there. It represents something of the past that you never dream of forever gone. Maybe it is karma, or it's my own undoing. I guess everyone will experience this at least once, maybe after this time i will learn how to deal with such emotions better.

Droid blogging

It's my first time using my motorola milestone to blog and obviously it is not as easy as blotting from my desktop. I'm at someone care centre, waiting for my fellow gesl members to turn up as we are heading to bring back 125 cartons of newater. Just finished my maths micro teaching, and I am quite glad that my mood has not affected my micro teaching.

Talks over the phone for 2 hours plus last night just to convince myself that the relationship should end. No point fighting a two person battle alone. I just hope my mind and heart is set this time.

I Never Told You

A New Start

I wanted a new start and probably needed a new start. I have not been blogging much on my blogspot, and decided to start anew on a new platform.

These few weeks have been full of unanswered questions and worries. I finally got my answers, although the answers were bad and left me disappointed and detached from reality. My semester is ending and holidays coming, but it is really a bad time to begin all my troubles. Maybe it's karma, or it's fate, but i guess what started easy might end easily. No matter how much effort I've tried, it will never be enough to someone who has already determine things are ending.

Maybe I overstepped or I over-estimated, or maybe it is just a game that efforts are less emphasized and focus more on skills. I do not know what the future holds, but I just hope that my phasing back and forth between realities will start to end. There is a saying that when a door is closed for you, God will open another door for you. I hoped that the door is not totally closed, nor am I sure that I want new doors to open. I just hope that the rainy days will be over soon and holiday will be more endurable. Else, practicum is going to be a chore.

I know time will heal all wounds, but it does not implies that there would be no scar.... Started with this, and shall end with this....